Neurora

This is me trying to put my experience into words. It will be different for many people. I have met plenty of individuals for whom it's different.

But for me… it's complex. It comes in many different shapes— and caused by many different situations.

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Hearing

Sometimes it’s loud. Sometimes it’s just… wrong— Too sharp, too fast, too repetitive, too layered.

And when it’s been too much for too long, There’s no middle ground left.

I can’t stand any of it anymore. I try to block it with music, but that only pushes me further… And if I try to turn it down… it will be muted.

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Vision

Sometimes the light itself is too much. Not because it’s technically bright— just intrusive—flashes of light.

Even walking past a simple lamp is too bright. The sun reflecting off a wall. A screen's glow, even though it’s already quite dim.

They all start to hurt my eyes.

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Touch

Most of the time, I want neutrality. I don’t want anything tight, scratchy, or textured.

A hair brushing against my skin. The clothing I have been wearing for hours. Even a pet sleeping on my lap.

But when things flip— suddenly they all are too much.

And I want to throw a table. Not from anger, but out of frustration. I just… want it to stop.

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All the things and many more. All of this gathers like a body of water

And if it reaches too high… my brain becomes heavy, like it's drowning

No more fucks to be given— There’s no more pleasure in life. My body gets muted, and sensations disappear.

Until enough time has passed for the water to evaporate. Giving me time to recover, only waiting for the next time it will precipitate.